x96 (hard)

It’s hard.

___

When I was really struggling with processing the sexual abuse on my own, before I involved therapists or doctors, I wrote a letter. And the person I wrote that letter to referred me to the Enough Abuse organization from the Prevent Child Abuse America and Mass Citizens for Children.

I shared an image from them on Facebook.

I know that I write (somewhat) openly about my experiences with childhood sexual abuse, and I know that these blog entries are linked to my Facebook account. I know this, but it still seems separate from, say, posting a status update or sharing an image.

And it’s hard.

It’s hard putting myself out there, identifying as a  survivor or victim, knowing that I have family members who look and wonder and have questions but never ask. Every once in a while I’ll get from a friend, “I see what you put out there, and you are helping people.” But sometimes that seems distant, and I simply feel…

Watched. Judged.

And it’s hard.

___

I think the person I wrote the letter to thought that the Enough Abuse campaign was a therapy organization. They’re not. They’re an activist organization. The brilliant thing about the recommendation was, that me wanting what happened to me to never happen to another child and actually working to prevent that is some of the best therapy I could have been given.

So it’s hard. But if it’s hard for me, maybe it’s easier for someone else.

Advertisements

One response to “x96 (hard)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s